Hello loyal readers! Still there?
YEAH.....So.... I've been gone for a long time, and I'm sorry about that. My trip to Portland last year was honestly so much more difficult and emotionally draining than I'd ever thought it would be and it necessitated some major self care. Unfortunately for the blog, it meant backing away from writing so I could process my thoughts and feelings. And it took ALL YEAR. Yes. A year.
I've got to either develop thicker skin, better coping strategies, or just find a way to continue writing through the painful thoughts and experiences that I've pretty much set my self up to endure by taking on this writing project- I likely need to do all three of those things. In all honesty, the trip to Portland really made me confront how unready I was for the task at hand. And it's not that traveling is hard (although it is). It's the emotional toll the experience of having my basic needs neglected over and over that just isn't good for me emotionally. It's a ugly space to dwell in, so I pushed it away. I had to at the time. As much as I really REALLY want to write about my experiences traveling with a disability, as much as I realize what an important project it is to me, and hopefully for others... Honestly? Some days it's just too fucking hard to have to live the experiences, let alone have the time and space and heart to write about it as well. If I'm being perfectly honest, traveling to Portland reminded me *exactly* why I'd become a creature of habit and avoided exploring new places. But I truly love traveling, and so I must.
So. I hope you can be patient with me as I navigate both new and familiar streets, neighborhoods and feelings from here on out.
I'll try to be more consistent from now on. No matter what happens along the way. The good, the bad and the ugly will be recorded for posterity. Wish me luck!
Much love,
Kitty
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